Lot of Jokes About Animals download and have fun
Some Jokes:
What is the difference between en elephant and a plum? An elephant is grey. What does Jane say when she sees a herd of elephants in the distance? Look! A herd of plums in the distance (Jane is colorblind)
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For all animal lovers out there: How do you make a cat go woof? Soak it in petrol, and set it on fire. and... How do you make a dog go miaow? Freeze it in liquid nitrogen, and run it through a bandsaw...
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A Second Opinion A man runs into the vets office carrying his dog, screaming for help. The vet rushes him back to an examination room and has him put his dog down on the examination table. The vet examines the still, limp body and after a few moments tells the man that his dog, regrettably, is dead. The man, clearly agitated and not willing to accept this, demands a second opinion. The vet goes into the back room and comes out with a cat and puts the cat down next to the dogs body. The cat sniffs the body, walks from head to tail poking and sniffing the dogs body and finally looks at the vet and meows. The vet looks at the man and says, Im sorry, but the cat thinks that your dog is dead too. The man is still unwilling to accept that his dog is dead. The vet brings in a black Labrador. The lab sniffs the body, walks from head to tail, and finally looks at the vet and barks. The vet looks at the man and says, Im sorry, but the lab thinks your dog is dead too. The man, finally resigned to the diagnosis, thanks the vet and asks how much he owes. The vet answers, $650. $650 to tell me my dog is dead? exclaimed the man.... Well, the vet replies, I would only have charged you $50 for my initial diagnosis. The additional $600 was for the cat scan and lab tests.
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Q: What has four legs and eight arms? A: A pitbull terrier at a childrens play area.